DETROIT WISDOM

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Living with Yourself

Some people think that they’re not beautiful. As a matter of fact, most people think that they’re not beautiful. And a strange thing is, the most beautiful people in the world think they’re not beautiful.

We have to know that the creator made us all different. Down to the tips of our fingers, we are an individual identity. Don’t compare your legs, or the straightness or curliness of your hair, or the color of your skin, or your smartness with somebody else’s. You are the best YOU in the creation.

If the creator creates a thousand people, none are like you. The creator says I have not created men or jinn except for my worship, and the creator says I have created everything in pairs.

Your mate has already been created because you have been created. And if they haven’t been created, they will be on the scene before you change form. Be patient, and don’t accept second best. As soon as you accept second best as your life long partner, especially after you’ve consummated the relationship, you’ll know instantaneously that you’ve made a mistake. A lot of people live with that mistake till they die, pretending and faking happiness all along.

Don’t let anybody embarrass you out of being yourself. If you don’t feel like its time for you to get married now, don’t get married for anybody. And if you feel that its time to get married, marry now in spite of what anybody says.

The human being is a creature that is made with the capacity and propensity to make mistakes, and you’re going to make them. That’s part of being human. But its better to make your mistakes, than someone else’s when they give you advice that’s inappropriate.

It took me a long time to learn to live with me. If people want to be bothered with me, I can be bothered with them. If no one wants to be bothered with me, I can be content and happy by myself. I’m not going to force any relationship just because I am alone.

You may find in the future that the best time you may have, or you may have had, even though you’re grown, or think you’re grown, is the time that you had alone.

Filed under Beauty Life Yourself Creator Love Worship compare marriage relationship

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Pain is the result of unfulfilled expectations

I was 21 years old and I fell in love for the first time. She was 16 and so I wanted to do everything correct and above board. I went to her mother and father and asked for her hand in marriage, but it was only one slight problem in the whole endeveour, she was already pregnant.

She had told me that a friend of hers had forced her into sex and that’s how she had gotten pregnant. She also told me that she had tried to commit suicide by taking some pain pills that did nothing but made her sleep. Since this was my first love, I wanted to get a validation from my parents so I went to my parents and said, “Uhhh, Im in love with the girl down the street.”

When I gave her name, my mother said, “she’s a ho.” This is when the pain first started. I didn’t want to accept it but I always kept it in the back of my mind. So as I pursued marrying my first love, her parents’ only request was that she finish her education.

I bought her books and clothes, taught her how to drive and let her drive my car to school, and she was very popular because of all of this. I purchased a brand new home out in the burbs with new furniture, and I never thought that this would ever be a problem for anybody. I thought every parent would love a successful life for their daughter.

When her mother started seeing the things I was preparing for her, her mother got jealous. Instead of being supportive, she began to work to break our relationship up. Everytime I would come to the house, the mother would put the daughter to work and cuss at her and do mean things to her. Then one day, she told me I couldn’t see her daughter anymore. She wanted her daughter to see other people closer to her age. I was in extreme pain because I didn’t want to fight the family or say anything against the mother, because I wanted to marry the daughter. The pain increased until it became unbearable. The mother would only allow the young lady to go out with her friends who were not good for her. She would allow the young lady to sleep over at her girlfriends’ house - who had a brother.

The pain increased. It came to the point where I was getting ulcers, confused state of mind, and I had to make the decision of pursuing the relationship or breaking it off. When the pain became so intense, for my own health’s sake I had to break the relationship off.

Eventually she married her girlfriend’s brother, who loved to smoke weed. They got married and one week after they got married, he lost his job, and never got a job again as long as they were married. I still loved her, but I knew we could probably never be together. Her new husband introduced her to alcohol, cocaine, heroine, prostitution, boosting, and other perversions. I continued to love her because I couldn’t stop loving her.

I even married my first wife in order to try to get her out of my mind, but it didn’t work, because my first wife knew I was still in love with my first love. More pain.

The pain actually didn’t stop, until my first love’s heart burst because of a drug overdose. My first love’s brother saw me in a supermarket and told me she had passed. A tear rolled down my face, and for the first time in many long years, I was free of the pain.

From that point on up until today, I know that my heart is not supposed to be given to anyone or anything, except god.

Filed under love marriage drugs sex jealousy teen pregnancy pain bad wrong choices education expectations perversion death

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The phases of you

Most people don’t realize that every ten years, on average, your state of existence changes.

From the age of one to ten, your main reality is school and play. Almost nothing exists except the opportunity for free play.

From the age of ten to twenty, you start looking for yourself, and as you start finding yourself, you begin to question, how do I fit into my environment or society? From ten to twenty you are struggling for your identity as a person. And you’re struggling with am I a child or am I an adult? What does it mean to be an adult? And your major concern is graduating from school or having a boyfriend or girlfriend.

From twenty to thirty, society has tricked you, because this is the point where you think you’re grown. Most of the problems that you have in your life happen when you’re twenty to thirty. And since society has told you that you’re supposed to be grown between twenty and thirty, you try to act grown, but you don’t have the mental or psychological equipment to be grown. Forced relationships, and premature marriages happen, because you think its the time to get married. People accept relationships that aren’t good for them, so they can fit into society and people will think they’re normal because they have a boyfriend, girlfriend, or are married. This period is also the time when society tells you you’re supposed to accumulate things, lots of things. But you’ll be surprised to know that 50 percent of marriages are going to end by the time you’re 30, half the houses are going to be foreclosed, half the automobiles repossessed, and half the credit cards will be shut down because they’re maxed out past their limit. 30 is a very traumatic time for most people because society and your families have already determined what it is you’re supposed to do - which is to be successful. But this is difficult because most of you at the age of 30 haven’t reached adulthood yet.

You’ll find a lot of people from 30-40 coming back home to their parents house. Don’t think its abnormal, its just as normal as any cake. When you’re back at home between 30 - 40, your rationale is, I’m helping my parents pay the bills, but you really got nowhere to go. This is a new realization period and a time to reflect on all your past mistakes.

Spiritual adulthood actually starts at 40, but noone has told the people that adulthood starts at 40. A person’s capacity for enlightenment only begins at the age of 40. So if you haven’t become a success before the age of 40, guess what? You weren’t supposed to in the first place regardless of what anybody told you. The wise ones say, that you’ve lived a whole life if you’ve reached the age of 40.

Between the age of 40 and 50, is when your awareness evolves to see a greater purpose outside of just your own personal life. This time is when most people say, ‘if I was only 16 years old again, I would do it this way.’ Between 40 and 50 is when most men get a mid life crisis. Where they say, ‘to hell with all this family responsibility and car notes and tuitions’ and they want to get away from it all and reflect on the meaning of existence.

‘What is the meaning of all this? I go home after a long day of work, and my wife pretends she loves me but she’s really looking at the paper boy, and I’ll  never be able to accomplish the things I want with my job, and I’ll probably  just die. So this life ain’t fulfilling, its not worth living… The golf lessons, the  kids at ballet, everyones basically happy, but I’m miserable. I’m doing  everything they told me to do to be fulfilled, and I have it all, but I’m not  fulfilled at all.’
This mid life crisis is when the old man wants to get away from his wife and get his 17 year old live in girlfriend. And even a women in her 40s goes through her mid life crisis, and wants to be a cougar and get with a 17 year old guy. She might even leave the entire family and join some carefree group who live out of their van and smoke weed, traveling around, being free.

You become a positive role model at 50. But only because you threw everything away that was the facade of success. So from 40 to 50 you’re actually starting over again trying to get reeducated. You learn that what you had previously wasn’t sufficient to make you really happy. At 50 if you’re blessed you come into some kind of enlightenment. You begin to work more for the here after than the here and now. You also want to pass your experiences on to the next generation. You become a teacher by your presence but not necessarily by what you’re saying. You become one who is sought rather than one who is seeking. You’ve lived a whole life time so almost all of the experiences that could possibly happen have happened to you.

Between 50 and 60 you actually retire. But your true profession only just now begins. At 60 you become like a sage, because you have survived all of the obstacles and challenges to life. From 50 to 60 your focus is not on physical activities anymore. Your physical strength and stamina is declining, but your spirit is just now flexing its muscles. You are considered to be a wise person even if you’re not actually wise.

Between 60 and 70 you are now preparing for your physical transition (death) The things that used to interest you, have almost no interest in this phase of life. Its a time where you’re trying to tie up the loose ends, and accomplish the very important things that need to be done before you pass on. You’re hoping to find a successor in whatever field you’ve endeveoured in - an apprentice. You’re extremely lucky if you find anybody who understands the value of what you have to give.

Between 70 and 80 you’ve done your job. You’re completely attached to the creator. Nothing matters but him. The only wisdom is He. You have a one on one relationship and communication with him. Happiness is knowng that he is pleased with you and you are pleased with everything that he does to you or for you. Nothing else matters in the creation but He. You and He are intimate friends. And almost nobody can understand why you’re so happy.

When you make your transition, it will be the most enjoyable time of your life.

Filed under detroit wisdom old age transition reality perception change life death meaning love marriage career mid-life crisis happiness value experience education family